Parent Adolescent Conflict

Conflicts between kids and their parents, or, speaking in more precise terms, between adolescent and their parents, is such a common problem, that it is impossible to imagine a person, who would not be acquainted with this sort of a conflict. Normally, we all know two sides of this conflict: at first, as children, and then as parents. However, each time, when children start acting in a strange way, each time there is a misunderstanding between a child and the parents, the latter forget about their own experience of childhood and start telling the good old stories about children being quite different and very smart in their times. However, for effective handling this sort of a conflict, one needs to be very well aware that such conflicts do exist, and they are not a result of the child's bad will, but a natural state of things, they need to be addressed with quietness and open mind.

Here is just one very typical conflict between an adolescent child and his/her parents. The child wants to stay out of home for a long period of time, to return home at the time he/she wishes to do it. However parents are worried and do not allow this. This is a conflict. And it can be effectively worked at. Parents should very openly speak to a child and explain their reasons for not letting him/her stay out of home for so long. The child should try to understand the arguments and either agree with the conditions, set by the parents, or offer another, alternative solution of the problem. This conversation should result in a compromise, which is good for both parties.

 

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An abnormal situation with adolescent/parents conflict is when a child, maybe due to the same reason - being forbidden to stay out of home for long - makes up his/her mind, that parents do not understand him/her and do not care. In such a case, a child might do something outstanding, like, for instance, run away from home and hide somewhere. This is a sign, indicating at the parents' helplessness, they are obviously not coping with the situation. The outcomes might be very unfortunate, depending on the age and the character of the child. The ideal variant in such a case would be to find the child, try to explain everything, and then visit a psychologist to ask him/her work on the problem. But that needs to be a conscious solution, taken by both parties.