Peer Review Assignment

The main argument under this review is based on the immorality surrounding organ trade, whereby buying and selling of organs are seen to be an issue worth an argument nation. Moreover, being an unethical issue, the practice is immoral mainly because it devalues humanity and widens communal gaps the way the author puts it in the thesis statement.  The argument relies on the April 2016 story based on Om Hussein and her family that attracted more concerns for majoring in organ trade, hence diminishing human value, which created a gap in the community.  It is lack of molarity that saw the above family’s father consider selling organs of his own children hence the subject of objective fact tailored to give worthiness and respect to human life.  Pride abundance was seen as a contributing factor to organ trade, which saw the argument of charitable contribution better positioned for community building, unlike the Om Hussein family.  The definition of morality as per the author under consideration of the above case study is more aligned to pride as compared to morals as the actions define it. Om Hussein Community is seen to be full of competitors just as the world is, hence, losing commonality, making some people look like strangers in society. Therefore, the community is defined by either group of individuals who share the same ideologies contributing to moral ethics or immorality if no common ideas are shared.

The author’s introduction defines the argument clearly by cruising on valid ideas that relate to the concept of organ trade. The thesis statement indicates the expected points of organ trade through the discussion. The resemblance argument used was based on one example that summarizes the whole topic. The author validates his argument by using examples and updated references that can be justified, making the topic argumentative.  The author's thesis reads as follows; “ The case of Om Hussein serves as the perfect case to discuss this point This is a family with one primary “breadwinner” that can no longer work and decides to resort selling their organs, and even selling the organs of their child. This practice is immoral because it devalues human life, widens communal gaps, and perpetuates the practice.”  The thesis explains the whole argument even though the supporting paragraphs also explain the main idea. The conclusion not only summarizes the ideas of the essay but also relates to the real-world situation regarding organ trade while relying on Om Hussein's example. The author even extrapolates on the issue of immorality based on any community that may understand it and be defined by the actions of the people of the given society.

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The paper does not fully adhere to the APA style of formatting and writing, with punctuation and quotations not used. Besides, the source used is not well-formatted in APA style, and it lacks the date when the information was retrieved from the website used. The author only used one source as the reference to the given definition argument; hence did not meet the requirements of the five sources. However, the voice and tone of the essay are effective in characterizing ideas and contributing to the appropriate mood throughout the essay. The paper makes good use of varied sentence structures through the use of active verbs and precise wording hence making it easy to transit between the ideas of the author without missing the point. In addition, the author’s grammar and spelling are not bound by major errors, but only a few areas of improvement.

In general, the three things I like about the essay include the following; first, the introduction section is well composed with a valid thesis based on a relevant example in the definition of immorality around lower-class organ trade. Secondly, the author makes good use of transition between paragraphs giving a reliable explanation of the argument. Thirdly the use of valid examples makes the definition argument realistic and easy to relate to and understand. However, some of the things that may require improvement:  first, the author needs to cite all his work effectively. Secondly, the conclusion should be compressed to only cover the main argument. Thirdly the punctuation and structuring of some sentences require slight improvement.

 

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